Tampon dispensers

Sorry boys, this one may not be for you, but I promise it won't be gross!

So about a month ago, I'm enjoying a lesiurely day at the mall when I feel an all too familiar twinge in my stomach. I scurry to the nearest bathroom I can find and open my purse to retrieve my tampon wallet. (Yes ladies, these actually exist, and I highly recommend them.) Empty. Darn! I'm kicking myself for not being more prepared when I look up and there on the wall is a tampon dispenser. Relief!

Now, I've never actually used a tampon dispenser before, but in theory, I've used a coke machine, a gumball machine, and a pez dispenser, so I deduce that this should be a piece of cake. I pull out a quarter, put it in the slot, and turn the handle. Jammed! Now what? I continue to fiddle with the handle for a bit, and by this time a small line has formed for the bathroom. Great...an audience. I glance up at my viewers and wonder why no one has been nice enough to just offer me a tampon. Judging by their ages, I'm doubting the possibility that all of them have hit menopause or ditched their uteruses.

It's then that I realize the problem...the tampon dispenser is mounted right next to the infamous condom dispenser. With me standing in front of the dispensers, there is no way for these women to know if I'm trying to get a tampon or a condom. I feel my face getting hot. How embarrassing! I mean, seriously, does anybody even use those condom dispensers?!

Too flushed and mortified to just turn around and ask somebody for a tampon, I decide to give it another go. I slip a second quarter into the slot, say a little prayer and carefully turn the handle. Victory! Not one, but two tampons are dispensed. I retrieve the tampons and as I walk to the back of the line I hold them out a bit so the peanut gallery can see...ya know, just so there's no confusion.

Moral of the story...Number one: Always keep your tampon wallet stocked.....Number two: Ladies, next time you see a girl fidgeting with the dispenser in the bathroom, put the poor thing out of her misery and just offer her a tampon.

What would you do with YOUR free time?

What would you do with all the free time in the world? I'm sure many of you would LOVE to have just one day off to rest, lounge around, watch TV, maybe read a book, or clean house. And gosh, what you wouldn't give for a whole week off! You could travel. Visit friends and family, shop a little, or maybe do some camping. Sounds great, doesn't it?

Well, let me tell you...I've been out of school since June 19th and have recently become employed by a company called MenuCare, but I don't start work for another couple weeks. If you do the math, that's nearly 4 months of "vacation". In those 4 months I've been to the beach twice, I've moved to Cleveland, OH, rode roller coasters at Cedar Point, gone camping, caught up with family at family reunions, visited old friends, made a few new ones, tailgated at a Browns game, ate cow's ear at Lola's (or was it pig's...either way it was gross) and cheered on the Tribe at an Indians baseball game. When I read over that last sentence, my life sounds kind of interesting; however, on a daily basis things have become somewhat monotonous.

I get up around 7ish--a curse I can bet I got from the Erenrich's--I make some coffee, have a little devotional, do some dishes, maybe scrub the bathroom, go for a run, get some groceries from Dave's Market, stop in to Target to see what's new, then plop down on the couch with some lunch and "Twilight"(my 6th book since June 19th) and awkwardly fall in love with Edward Cullen, the vampire, with every page I read. (please tell me I'm not the only one!) Oh yea, and about this time I just so happen to look over at the clock on the digital cable box...11:45...AM!!!! You have got to be kidding me?!

I sit there and start to plan out my retirement--and by that I mean, I plan to never retire and to never be this bored again--when it hits me...it's not the free time that is so awful. It's the monotony. You all out there working 9-5 desk jobs are bored, too. That's what makes the holidays so great, isn't it? The opportunity to change things up a bit. Have a little time off. Make some conversation with some fresh faces. Admit it, the brown noser in the cubical next to you makes your cousin, the rambler, very interesting.

Anyways, the point I'm trying to make in a very round-about way is that life will always be monotonous, whether you are laying on the couch every day or working your butt off every day. And contrary to what people believe, the grass is not always greener on the other side. Once you get there, the grass dies just the same. So make the most of the life you've been dealt. Each season of your life is there for a purpose. When you are working, work at it with all your heart; and when you are at home playing with your kids in the backyard, play as if you never have to work another day in your life. In doing so, you may just provide a little rain and sunshine for that grass of yours. It certainly may have the potential to die, but I never said you couldn't help it grow!

Blogging?

I'm not sure I know exactly how to blog, and I'm not even sure I know the purpose of a blog. Some days this may just be my place to vent or to organize my thoughts, and other days there may be interesting things going on in my life that I'd love to share with those that I love. Either way, I'm going to give this a shot. Read at your own risk! :)